Society's Predetermined Path

Well hello reader!

This is my first blog post, and I thought I would write about society and the predetermined “path” that we are all supposed to follow. This subject has been on my mind A LOT recently because I often question what I am doing with my life.

First and foremost, let me introduce myself, I’m Danielle and I’m 20 years old, from Ottawa, Ontario. I am currently a business student at Ottawa U. I am nowhere NEAR being a writer so bear with me. I’ll end it there because if I start talking more about myself I will go on tangents about every single detail… and this post will be long enough as it is.

The point of this first post: THE PATH! We all know the path. It starts in kinder garden, where you learn how to count, and how to sing the alphabet! Then its elementary school, middle school, secondary school, college or university, graduate school maybe, decent job, husband/wife, and kids. This is the life society tells us to live. This is what we all grow up thinking should happen, and is our idea of how life should be, and what scares me the most, is that our happiness, in some cases, depends on it.

Although, this is definitely not the case for everyone, so please read taking in account that his is my point of view, my experiences and my personal thoughts. I do know some people who are going in completely different direction than the path and I honestly feel liberated knowing that we are not ALL prisoners of the path. But I’ll admit, I’m stuck in it. Here it goes.

During my last year of high school, I had absolutely NO idea what I was going to do after I graduated. But there was one thing I knew for sure. I was going to university. In what? No idea, because I had NO IDEA what I wanted to do yet. But I was pressured by my parents, my teachers and my peers to apply to university, and by a certain deadline, when I had no idea what I was getting myself into.

I applied into chemical engineering, environmental sciences and business. Did I actually want to study any of these? Nope. But I knew I would be good at it. And I couldn’t just jump out of the moving vehicle of the path. I had to continue even if I didn’t like where I was going, I guess I didn’t have full control of the steering wheel! Maybe none at all. I am now in the middle of completing my bachelor degree in business and I have spent hundreds of hours dedicated to learning and mastering the concepts of business statistics, finance, accounting, management, marketing, etc. Not to mention the money I’ve invested in it. I’ve spent so much money on tuition, books, and review sessions. It’s kind of insane how powerful the path can be.

Now after thinking about it a lot, I sometimes wish I would’ve taken a year off. This would have allowed me to actually think about what I want to do with my life. I could’ve saved the effort and money and spend it all on what I actually want to accomplish in life, once figured out. I am still not completely sure what I want to do with my life, but I do have more of an idea. And it is not what I am doing right now, but I don’t know if I will be able to jump off of this moving vehicle and follow my own path.

I want to work in the film industry. If I am passionate about anything, it is movies, film, photography and music. AKA… the arts!! But I went in business! Even in high school, I never took the awesome video and photo shop class that was offered, because I decided to take math, calculus, physics and chemistry instead. I was too focused on doing what the people around me expected me to do and not on what I actually wanted to do. And so I just kept doing that, it’s not like I could’ve decided after working so hard in high school in the math classes, to go in arts where it isn’t even needed! And the worst part is, I was really really really good at math. I am still good at math, I do best in my economics, accounting and stats classes than my electives, when people see that, it is viewed as some sort of crime to not make use of the potential. BUT I DON’T EVEN LIKE IT THOUGH!! Who does??? (Alright I’ll admit sometimes I like it but solely because I am good at it and it feels good to be good at something, but Jesus Christ why did you have to make me good at math out of all things?)

I know what most of you are probably thinking, well why don’t I just stop what I’m doing and go to a film school? It’s not that simple… I can’t just throw away all the hard work I have put in since high school. I can’t drop out of university after spending countless hours studying, and after spending so much money into my school. I must at least finish my degree. And you know what that means? That means I cannot derive from the path for another 2 years. And who says in two years I will not be brainwashed by society even more that I must now go get my MBA, or go to law school, or just try to find a job in my field of study.

How will people react if I tell them I am going to film school? Think about that. And now think about how will they react if I tell them I will be completing an MBA? That’s the problem right there. The path is where there is certainty of social acceptance. The path is what is safe. I know that when I finish my bachelor degree, if I go get my MBA, the chances of me getting a decent job, even a great job, is fairly high. And a decent job is an essential part of society’s path. If I decide to go into film school, there is much less opportunities, it will be much more complicated, not many people will believe in me and support me like they do now, and I could struggle.

Wow that was a pretty large tangent about my own situation, ANYWAYS.. once you’ve figured out your job situation, what about the whole husband/wife and kids situation? You can’t deny that as an average Canadian, your family and your friends all expect you to get married and have kids. It’s what everyone is supposed to do right? You’re supposedly going to find “the one”, get married, have 2 kids, (maybe three if you’re feeling adventurous), and eventually get a dog.

In reality, this does NOT happen for everyone. Some people don’t find “the one” and some people don’t want kids. And you know what, that is OKAY. Maybe some of you are laughing at me like “duh, life isn’t just about that.” But seriously, my whole life, up until recently, I thought that if I didn’t find “the one”, get married, and have kids by the age of 30, my life was over, I would be depressed and I might as well give up on life entirely. How horrible is that? Putting so much pressure on myself, to attain these goals that are set out for me and that I’m not even sure I even want! Do I want to get married and have kids? The automatic answer is yes, because that’s what I’ve been taught my entire life. But realistically, now that I have experienced more things in life, and I have seen more things, I’m not sure of what I want. With divorce rates going up like crazy, knowing that people cheat on each other, knowing that married couples end up hating each other, do I want that?

Even if my hypothetical future husband and I don’t end up cheating on each other, what tells me we won’t get sick of each other after 10 years and want to rip each other’s heads off? How am I supposed to know that the person will be the same person in 20 years? It’s impossible, hell I’ll be a different person too! The idea of marriage just isn’t clear to me anymore. True love isn’t clear to me anymore, but that will have to be a different blog post ‘cause I could go on for days.

So why am I following the path? I don’t fucking know, I am very afraid to be stuck in it forever. But the fear of the uncertainty and rejection from others is what drives it.

And it is scary to jump out of a moving vehicle.

#society #path